The very last day of the year has started and with it gone, so will be my twenties(not officially till August, but still!). 2013 was very special to me, my life got so much richer(although i definitely got poorer, babies need a lot of stuff!). It seems as if everything is painted a little bit pink. I feel more free and so much stronger(although on a physical level, sometimes walking is a struggle!).
Since the year is about to change i want to do a thorough cleansing in my home, without any actual cleaning though because my back is killing me today! So today i am going to burn some labdanum and roses and let that sweet smoke reach deep into my soul.
Have a blessed New Year's Eve full of love and laughter!
The very last day of the year has started and with it gone, so will be my twenties(not officially till August, but still!). 2013 was very special to me, my life got so much richer(although i definitely got poorer, babies need a lot of stuff!). It seems as if everything is painted a little bit pink. I feel more free and so much stronger(although on a physical level, sometimes walking is a struggle!).
at 12:55:00 PM
On Christmas day i gave a lot of love to my plants! They were so happy the next day!All this time because of my back i had other people taking care of them, and they were healthy, but all this wonderful energy they used to emanate, was not the same, if there at all. Even my pomegranade tree that used to have four leaved clovers growing underneath it, had only plain three leaved ones! I still have so much gardening to do and i can not wait!
With my exam just around the corner my whole life seems to be on pause. I am not functioning as i should. All this stress has taken its toll on my sleeping and eating. It's only been a week since i stopped biting my nails and i just can't convince myself to diet!
For me dieting is not about restrictions and denial of certain foods but about planning ahead. It is the way my brain works... if i want to succeed in anything i have to think it through. So, if healthy living is the goal scheduling meals and exercise is the way!
Soon! Life is going to start again soon!
at 1:53:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends. How are you? I have beeen away for so long! Melina Nefeli is growing up so quickly she now wears clothes for 18-24 months old and she is only 5! She knows the words milk, mom, dad and hi(in greek of course). She has two best friends in the form of the two most caring and loving cats that constantly compete for her attention.
This last couple of days something sad happened to me. I realised just now that i have never talked here about my relationship with my father. It has always been a really strenuous one. He has a bad temper and it was really hard growing up with a person that constantly calls you and your mother names, yells and throws stuff and threatens you with physical violence(that he has not acted upon). His episodes happen completely unexpectedely. The minute you let your guard down, show him affection or even think of giving him another chance he has a violent outburst. In the five months of my daughter's life he has n't seen her more than fifteen times and in that little time he had with her he managed to cause the three most negative experiences of her life. The first when she was a newborn he started yelling at my mother because she said they should leave. The second time he came with my mom to take the dog and he was waiting in the car and my mom stayed a few more minutes. He repeatedly pressed the bell(who he knows is a very loud one) for over thrity times(probably a lot more he was doing it for several minutes), making both the pediatrician and a client of mine who were here to ask worryingly what is wrong. And the third one and last one ever when he came with my mom two days ago and while i was feeding the baby he started calling me names and cursing loudly in my apartment building and in front of the baby because half an hour earlier i told him not to kiss the baby's hands because she puts her in the mouth. This kind of language has never been spoken in my house before. This kind of yelling never took place in the past in my house and i promised myself that my baby will not see that kind of ugliness again. So, i cut him off. I told my mother i never want to see him again in my life. My baby will know only love and compassion.
I feel free and calm and i knew when it happpened that it was for the best. A true blessing in disguise. Somehow, although for years we were astranged, through my mom he found a way back in my life. Now i do not have to put up with him ever again.
The minute he left and i put the baby to sleep i cast every cleansing, protection spell known to man. Before i begun i was so angry at him.After that i was exhausted but the rage was gone.I even felt sorry for him and all the things he lost and will lose from our lives. I was calm by then and i knew what needed to be done. The Goddess was truly in my heart. And the next morning i turned a new page in my life.
There were a few moments that the light and darkness fought inside me. And he is the only person in my life that made me want to use dark magic(several times in my life i had thoughts i am not proud of). I am so glad i did not feed that endless cycle of hate and i just let go. Now there is room in my heart only for love and that would not be the case if i chose to channel my anger into something bad. That was n't always the case.
When i was a teenager my mom and i were reading a book of magic while taking breakfast(we were weird like that). And there was a dark spell to cause harm(i do not remember the specifics). Only like many others that it had blanks were you put the name of the person and the name of its mother. And i did not perform the ritual i just read it outloud with his name in the blanks. My mom freaked out. We were n't studying dark magic to cast it but to know to protect from it. Within the hour he came home violently ill. I was amazed. I did not do the ritual, i was not even concentrated when i read the spell. But there was all this residual anger lingering, waiting to take form that it made it easy. I read the reversal and my mom was cleansing our home for months after that and i never did anything like that ever again. But i remember how easy it felt. I do not want to admit it but i liked it.. It felt like i was gaining control of my life when in fact i was losing it.
When i felt i could not protect my baby from him all those feelings resurfaced and i had to focus on the people i love and everything i care about to not get sucked into the darkness. I am so happy i did. Hopefully everyone will move on now.
at 2:33:00 PM
..and decorations have to be taken out., pies to be baked, wreaths to get made, a baby to get dressed in an orange outfit and a pumpkin to be bought and then transformed into breads and cakes..
Are n't you excited?
I can almost smell the cinnamon, the cloves and the nutmed. Mmm!
at 5:03:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends! How are you? I know i ve been gone for a while. It is n't because of the baby though. I have been kind of freaked and i could not write here. My thyroid is a bit out of order and i feel a bit more stress than usual(which is a lot!!!). The hormone imbalance does n't allow me much sleep and i get more and more frustrated. When i get into bed all the crazy thoughts enter my mind and when i manage to shut them out i still can't get some shut eye. It used to be a lot worse before my doctor changed the dosage of my thyroid medication and i used to obsess about a biopsy i will be doing soon. Now i understand no sleep plus hormones equals crazy lady roaming the house at middle of the night thinking of life insurance policies. Whoever said Leos are overdramatic was obviously mistaken..We are the coolest, most collected of people!
Melina Nefeli is growing like a weed! Everyday i have to put away clothes that are too small for her. She is 10 weeks old now. She says gala(oh well, it sounds more like gallgaea) which is greek for milk. We keep repeating it to her and i am pretty confident she will learn how to say Shut Uup next. Unlike her mom she is sleeping all night long. By the way, i did n't see that coming . The baby to be calm and quiet and me giving new meaning to the word insomnia. Soon, my dosage will be once again changed and i will find solace into Orheus's arms.
Leanna passed on to me an award. If you do not know her yet, get over to her blog fast, she is the funniest woman alive! I have n't done an award in quite some time because i am very lazy, but tonight i felt like it. I was n't going to sleep so, what the hell?
By the rules, i have to tell you 7 things about me that i have n't shared with you in the past.
1. I am lucky enough to know my husband and my best friends since high school. One of them just moved to the Netherlands to study Arts and i do not know what i will do without her.
2. I am a compulsive reader. Even if i do not like a book i have to read it to the end. My favourite author is Marquez, his books have turned me autistic from time to time.
3. You all know i love plants, but when i was a child i used to hate the gardening chores my father used to give me. I did n't appreciate his garden either.
4. I do not like movies , i love watching tv shows. Whenever i have time i just love watching many episodes in a row. My sleepless nights were filled with teen wolf, drop dead diva and many others. I can't wait for the new season to begin.
5. My husband and i have completely different taste in music. That would not normally be a problem but we are both musicians, so there are a lot of disapproving looks going on. After 10 years of living together we are a lot more tolerant than we used to.
6. I get food fetishes. I obsess over a food and keep making it over and over until i can't eat it any more. My current obssession is eggplant.
7.I am a recovering sugar addict. It's been 10 hours since the last time, but it was n't my fault. Someone brought home a cake. I threw it away because i was doing so well. It has been a week. But i ate a couple of tablespoons. I am going to go cold turkey now. That means no honey either.
And now to the fun part of the award. I have to pass it along to 7 bloggers. Here they are
They are all wonderful unique bloggers and they always manage to bring a smile to my face.
Have a blessed month,week and day!
at 3:17:00 AM
Greetrings dear blogfriends. Lammas is just around the corner and just a week later is my birthday.I am turning 29 on the 8th of August. Lughnasad is one of my favourite holidays but to mark the day this year i will just bake a pie and burn some incensee. The most important part of the celebration will be eating a hearty meal and giving thanks for all our blessings.
This year i have so many things to be thankful for.
my wonderful husband. Our healthy family. Lots of wonderful friends.Our jobs. And the newest addition to the gang our beautiful fairy princess.
at 8:03:00 PM
Here she is, 9.5 pounds of cuteness!
at 7:07:00 PM
She is the most amazing creature i have ever set my eyes on. The softest thing i ever touched and her smell is divine. She was born on the Magic Cusp at 6.14pm with a ceasarean because after 12 hours of labour, two oxytocin bags and other drugs i can not remember, i still was n't dialated at all, because of her position. But despite things not going as planned what is important is that i brought into the world a pink, healthy baby that weighed 3380kg.
I on the other hand could be better.I returned from the hospital with a uti. My back is killing me, i can not walk,but i am getting better every day. I can't wait to be on my feet so i can enjoy her even more. Sleep deprivation plus hormones equals me crying over every little thing. Baby can't latch on my nipples, i cry. The amount of breastmilk i pump is little for her and the doctor says i should supplement, i cry. I freak out so badly, about every little thing that has to do with her. I am worried all the time. I am having great difficulty to center and find my balance. But then she sleeps on my chest and i watch her and i feel the happiest and fullest i have ever been.
While i was giving birth i asked of my husband to burn a piece of paper with a protective spell i wrote for her. Then while it was the full moon he did the first magical thing of his own. He thanked the Moon Goddess for us. He texted me that while i was in the hospital and i thought that this was the sweetest thing.
I hope your Solstice was a magical and powerful one full of fairy dust and love.
at 8:29:00 PM
Greetings dear blogfriends. How have you all been doing. I am getting bigger by the second! The baby is not kicking anymore she is pushing really hard! My belly is round feels like a planet. I can't say i can still do many things, but the nesting fase has really kicked in. I should be resting but i can't helping. Let's bring plants in the nursery, let's clean everything...again, let's buy a lot of crap that likely we will not use. Every single day there is a new crazy idea that i can not do by myself and my poor husband has to run around Athens to do it. But the thing that is completely out of control is my eating. Yesterday evening i ate 6 slices of pizza and a scoop of icecream. The thing is that a few hours earlier i have already had a healthy but filling dinner. Today i am on a diet again and by diet i mean that i will not have another day that i exceed 3000 calories. I will try to stay around 2000(which are just plenty) to balance out the craziness that was last week. I do not know what got into me. And it is summer for crying out loud. I got crazy hungry, weird cravings and all the stuff that i used to say i have n't felt in all my pregnancy came back to haunt me in the form of icecream! Oh so much icecream!
That being said my last date is the 21st of June. And i am hoping(fingers crossing, spells casting, soul selling lol) that i will reach that. If she actually comes that day she is going to be a Soltice and a Full Moon baby. Doubly blessed and doubly magical. Hopefully her mommy will not weigh the double amount of kilos by then!!
Be blessed, be loved and be very very happy!
at 4:03:00 PM
Hello blogpeople. How have you been? Here the summer has begun a tad early and it is a bit hot, but i love it! I can't go swimming because i am supposed to be resting, but it is still wonderful. Tomorrow is the greek Easter and we will go to my parents. The festivities of it all include over eating and over drinking. Although, we have n't gone to church with our parents(not that they are regulars) for over a decade and we have nothing to do with the Christian worship, every year we celebrate with our families Easter and Christmas. The traditional gift giving takes place, chocolate eggs are given to the children and traditional music that no one can stand plays through the speakers(during Easter, on Christmas is all about the usual Rudolf stuff!).
It always makes me a little sad the fact that our families can not be part of our festivities, but to them it would just be too weird. Us on the other side grew up celebrating those holidays, expecting for Santa to bring us gifts on Christmas and everybody we knew to bring us chocolate on Easter.
So, celebrating means quality time with our families, and since our families are n't religious, at all, they see these opportunities the same way we do. All in all we rest, we laugh and enjoy each other. But it is still a shame that we can not take time off work, or school for the holidays of our choice. Sometimes we get lucky, like this May Day that we both did n't have work
How do you feel during those occasions?
Have a magical weekend.
at 1:10:00 PM
Hello there blogpeople. How was your May Day? Mine was absolutely perfect! Full of magic and love. The best part was that i got to spend almost all day with my husband. It was so wonderful! We gave lots of love to our plants. Then i gathered lots of different and small pink flowers from my pots as well as lavender blossoms, ivy, fern and asparagus fern(which i love!) that we made into a beautiful and huge wreath. That took us about an hour and a half ! We also cast together a protection-cleansing spell. I had a wonderful cleansing shower. We went and bought some different kind of berries to eat and mark the day. And then we celebrated Beltane a bit more traditionally..if you know what i mean"wink-wink"!
Although we were all day on our feet, doing things, we relaxed and rested. We both work a lot and we do not get to spend a lot of time together, so yesterday was a true blessing. The last couple of days helped us both to get in a calmer state of mind about the baby's well being and to trust into the Goddess.
I want to thank you all for your support and comments! Your words gave me so much comfort and peace. And i also want to mention that i have stopped crying! I am constantly smiling, enjoying the euphoria of being pregnant in late Spring, sipping iced lemonades and teas, eating berries and soaking in the greek Sun! Oh and above all, being pregnant is like being a princess. I do not have to get up for anything, except peeing(which is so frequent that you can count it as working out). I love being treated this way!
I hope you had an enchanted and fairy Beltane full of love and light.
at 9:49:00 PM
Greetings dear blogfriends. Beltane is almost here and there was n't ever inside me such a need for celebration. It will be our third year anniversary, since we had our handfasting on the 1st of May of 2010. Ever since we renew our vows to each other and celebrate our union, each year at this day. But on this particular sacred day of fertility and love i also want to connect to the Goddess and pray to Her.
You see last week we went to the doctor for our 3d trimester doppler and although a week before the baby was at a perfectly normal weight, at that point she was almost at the lowest of the normal range. So, in this week it seemed as if she didn't gain any weight at all(unlike her mother!). Today only 5 days later, we went for a u/s and she was 200 grams bigger ,but still a bit small. I spent these 5 days on bed rest and i consumed a bit more protein than usual(100-120grams) and it seemed to have helped. So i will be resting as much as possible and will keep eating the extra protein(all hail cottage cheese) to help her grow. To be sure today they gave me a cortisone shot in case she has to come early, which is supposed to help her lungs develop faster.
After we returned from the doctor, and i have stopped crying, i drew a beautiful triskellion, with three pretty spirals on my belly (this particular symbol has a great connection to pregnancy, it is supposed to represent the 9 months of pregnancy, each spiral stands for three months) and prayed to the Goddess to help her grow.
In every other sense she is doing fine. The blood she is receiving is great, as is the amniotic fluid and she is kicking like a professional kick boxer, making my belly jump in weird ways. Everyone is telling me that there is no reason to worry, and i feel it in my heart of hearts that she is just fine, but since i am hormonal i cry every time i think about it. And i have cried multiple times in front of the doctors, nurses,midwives and the rest of the personel. I can't help it...For a few seconds i open my eyes as wide as i can trying to calm myself but as soon as the first tear falls there is no stopping. Even as i remember it i am welling up. It is ridiculous! The worst is that whenever someone told me not to cry, i cried even harder. Unfortunately i have always been unable to control my tears even in social situations that this was preposterous and the humiliation of these moments haunts me even years later. But lately it is just unbelievable. I am like a little child that was denied ice cream.
But i digress, this Beltane our prayers will be about our daughter. So, everybody please think fattening thoughts!
at 10:50:00 PM
Hey blogfriends! I am down with a cold. It is not a bad one and i can only blame myself and my poor judgment over clothing , but i can still nag, can't i? I only hope that my voice will be back by Saturday because i have to sing. If that had happened last year i would lose a lot of sleep over it and how it would affect my performance but now i could care less. If i manage to stay stress free at the recital which has never happened in the past i will be very proud of myself.
I had some contractions last week and my doctor prescribed me magnesium and ever since i am very calm, relaxed and i sleep for at least 10 hours a day. If i knew that, i would have started taking the stuff many years ago.Before magnesium i was freaking out over what i will make for dinner. Now i watch birthing videos with breakfast and i am absolutely cool with it. For those of you completely grossed out.. i am sorry!
Tonight is the New Moon! I have n't trimmed my hair as i wanted, because i was bored, but i will do a couple of spells that my home desperately needs. Cleansing in particular is number one on the list. Recently, everything that can break down, did. The washing mashine was n't washing, the vaccuum was n't vaccuming, my computer still can not turn off without pressing the button for like half an hour and the freezer does n't make ice anymore. Also, Petros caught a cold then i decided all of the sudden i do not need winter clothes anymore and i also caught a cold and Tsitsini(our female cat) had a tooth problem. So, smudging, praying, chanting and potion making is what the night enstores for me.
Then i am going to prepare a salad(i buy them already clean and chopped, but i clean them again and add a few more ingredients) and Petros will make the chicken. After we eat i will go around the house and pick up all the used clinex tissues(you can't possibly imagine the mess i made) and those will be my chores for the day. I am sure you are all impressed by my energy levels and my house cleaning skills. I know.. I am awesome! But hey, i did defrag my computer. that's something, right?
Now i have to go and prepare my gazillionth chamomile tea for the day and crack open a new box of klinex. Good times!
Be blessed, be loved and be healthy(do not get fooled by the Sun.. He is lieing!!)
at 9:37:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends. How have you been? I have been a bit out of sorts lately! I was in a very unproductive mode. I spend a lot of time on the couch when i was not working. Baby is coming in a couple of months and my belly now has "alien" properties. You do not have to put your hand on it to feel her, you can just look! She has scared me a couple of times with the intensity of the movements. It feels like she is exploring. While she is bouncing around inside me, i am the less fit i have ever been in my entire life. But what is important is that we are both healthy and well.
The new moon is approaching and there is a lot to be done. First of all i need to trim a little bit my hair because they are full of split ends and they are kind of uneven. Then the house needs cleansing because there are a lot of stagnant negative energies in here. I even found a hand full of cat hair in a protective potion i always have outside my window. Which i still can not figure out how they got in there because the cats can not go there. Very weird and definitely a bad sign. In those particular potions, it is always a bad sign when dead bugs end up in them( as well as anything dead or dirty). But the amount of cat hair was weird. It was like someone was collecting hair of my cats for months and stuffed them in the glass. I am telling you.. weird!
Anyway...The weather here is lovely. Beautiful butterflies are happily flying everywhere! My plants seem content(although they still need a lot of work and i still can not help them with that, they just have to be patient and wait till i can do stuff again without feeling pain!). My pets love spending time in the balcony under the Sun. And last but not least my appartment everyday looks a little less like a refugee camp. So, all is well i guess! I just miss moving around, but i will have plenty of that once tiny one gets here.
So, all of you cyberfriends out there, enjoy the Spring(or Autumn if you are on the other side of the world) for me. Go outside and have fun. Take long walks and take in the smells. And every once in a while post a picture or two so i can live vicoriously through your blogs.
Lots and lots of love!!
at 2:07:00 AM
Greetings dear blogfriends and happy Spring! I am really excited about the Wheel turning! But you know that already, because i have been nagging for so long! I have n't posted for a while mostly because we had some connection issues and i am too spoiled to post from my cellphone! How was your Ostara? I made yet another wreath for my front door and casted a bunch of spells. A protection one, a money spell, a body and mind-Equinox one. I got over excited and although i had a lot of work that day when i finally had some time for myself i started casting spells and blessing the house.
Yesterday we went to our summer house to get some Sun and it was wonderful. The peace and quiet away from the city and the chirping of the birds cleared my mind. I really needed to get away from the house, since i spend so much time indoors. I played with the dogs and breathed the clean air. And now i feel like i have the strenght to conquer the world. Tonight is the first night of the Full Moon and as usual i am going to offer a rosemary pentagram to the Goddess, to thank Her for our baby.
I hope wherever you are you will be able to enjoy the beauty of the Moon and fill your souls with Her energy!
at 6:32:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends. How are you my lovelies? I got my oomph back! Yesterday i even got my sorry ass to the pool after a long time and did 80 laps(which is about 1,5kms since each lap is 18 meters, but i would n't trust my math if i were you!). Also, yesterday we saw our first 4d u/s of the baby(it is the orange one, the one the one where you can see characteristics). I put the pictures on the fridge and now every time we go to the kitchen we lose track of what we intended to do and why we originally went to the kitchen. I skipped two meals this way! So, to celebrate i made a blueberry cake with blueberry cream cheese frosting. This was the first time i made frosting(here in Greece we do not usually put icing on cakes, except for chocolate covered ones.It was very light, but it was still delicious! Here is my cake, minus two pieces!
at 9:36:00 PM
Greetings blogland! I have been absent for a few days.. It is like that ever since the waning fase of the moon begun, my energy levels started to fade as well. I am still trying to get up and get started. Coffee is n't cutting it anymore. The only thing that might get me through is a day without work, so i can focus on myself and my home. I know that if i start cleaning or working on my plants there is no stopping me. So, today i have cleared my schedule to get my oomph back.
I want to clean the kitchen, throw away all junk from the living room, go for groceries, make an eggplant diner, make my plants happy, take Phoebe for a walk, take a long shower, meditate and do some fairy magic. Just by making this list i feel better already and my energy levels are rising. All i need now is to get up and get going. Hopefully tomorrow i will be back to normal and out of the funk. It is only 19 days till Ostara and there are a billion things to be done.
How about you? Are you into an end of the winter funk or are you in a beginning of spring frenzy?
Be blessed, be loved and be happy!
at 2:25:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends. Tonight is the first night of the Full Moon and i have a bunch of things to do. As usual, a rosemary pentagram is to be made and left as an offering to my favorite crossroads, as a thank you for the greatest gift the Goddess ever gave us. Also, i recently bought a pretty moonstone amulet for protection for the baby and tonight it is to be charged. What i am kind of dragging my feet around, is going outside and tending to my plants. I have negleted them and deprived them of my love and care. Of course they are watered regularly but there is so much more i need to do. Since the rain has ceased for a while the neighborhood birds are to be fed today. One of the last feedings for the Winter. When Spring comes i gradually provide less food to them until the weather gets cold again.
Since the Wheel is about to turn, i have to do some fairy work as well. Their tree( a big pomegranade one) is about to bloom again and i have spotted a couple of brand new four leafed clovers under it). Offerings are to be made, spells to be cast and definitely some meditation time is in order.
If after all that i have some energy left(i am still recovering from the cold) i will bake a cake to have some to offer but also for some belly yumminess!
Have a blessed Esbat and a magical weekend!
at 5:50:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends! How are you? I am trying to focus on the positive of this cold and hard winter. I hate cold and i love summer. The hotter the weather the happier i am, which i know it is not something you find often in people. But the winter is almost coming to its end there are a few things that we still get to enjoy. So, i will focus on them.
I love the hot steaming teas and coffees( although to be completely honest i prefer the iced versions of them!). I love the warm clothes and the accesories. I love that i get to hug my husband for long periods of times and spoon with him under the covers. We do not do it as the weather gets hot because he has a very fast metabolism and although he is skinny he sweats like a pig. Even now in the middle of the winter, i hug him and he is often covered in sweat while i am shivering.
I love the mist that covers everything in the night. I love watching the wood burning in the fireplace and listen to the sounds of it. I love watching the trees while they dance to the wind. I love eating food hot from the stove. I love watching my cats sleeping in front of the fire, and putting the pink fluffy coat to my dog, so she can enjoy her walk(she hates the cold too, dreads rain and can't stand snow).
But most importantly i love that the winter is ending!
How about you? What is your favourite thing about winter?
at 12:30:00 AM
I used to enjoy waking up before everyone else and enjoy the day just as she was being born. But then i fell in love with a drummer and if we ever get to go to sleep around 1 am we call ourselves lucky. I need my sleep. 8 hours is the minimum for me. I can not function with less. I can not work with little sleep, because when i am doing a reading i have to be as close to feeling perfect as possible. I tend to overeat when i have n't slept well. Sometimes i get headaches and i am in such a bad mood.
I wonder in what ways our life will change now with the baby. I always wait for Petros to come home from a gig or a rehearsal, or a trip. That is mostly because i can't sleep well without him but also because when Phoebe(the dog!) hears him park the car, she starts running up and down, sobbing from joy, taking down numerous stuff in her path and i eventually wake up. If i wake up in the middle of the night it is extremely difficult for me to get back to sleep, so i choose to stay up and wait for my husband to return patiently. Well, obviously that will have to stop.
It is hard for me not knowing how some things will work. I am a planner. I need to know what is up ahead. It is in my blood. I do a daily reading for me, and a montly one and a yearly one and when something is bothering me, or stresses me out i read my cards many times a day. So, not knowing exactly how things will work is bugging me, the least... I understand that this is one of the things you can not prepare, or anticipate, when you are a first time mom, and that i just have to wait and see, but i have so many questions constantly in my head. How exactly will i be working? Could i have the baby with me in the readings like my mom did? How much Petros's schedule will change? Will he be enough around? Will i need extra help? Will i manage to take next January my diploma or i will just go for a degree and get it over with? Will i bother the baby when i sing? And the biggest one of all.. Will i do a good job? Am i going to be a good mom for her?
So for now all i can do is prepare the best way possible. Make the nursery, baby proof the house, find music for her, plan her wiccaning, work on spells for babies, learn about breastfeeding, learn about babies in general(i know so little, it is scary), find a couple of good pediatricians and well relax.
Today i have been searching for the best dreamcatcher for her crib. I have n't bought the crib yet, but i know which dreamcather i want. I am also working on the best combination of herbs for a peaceful sleep pouch, because until now i have made only ones for prophetic dreams(and that is definitely not peaceful!) .
Wishing you guys lots of luck and love, happiness and magic.
at 11:30:00 AM
Greetings blogfriends. I want to thank you for all your positive wishes, healing thoughts and magick.I am so much better today. No diarrhea, no throbbing throat pain, no being sick to my stomach. If i did n't sound like a baritone and my nose was n't still leaking, i would say the cold is gone. It is amazing what a good sleep can achieve. Yesterday night i was miserable, today i am almost healed, with just the help of some vapor rub and some chamomile tea.
I caught this cold from Petros. He was miserable for almost a week, the poor thing. I took good care of him and now he does too. I did my usual herbal potions with a healing Gaia spell for him and then me. Hopefully this is it for this year. This was my second cold (and Petros's millionth). In the past i used to be miserable with bronchitis, and even some times pneumonias, or in the most usual cases with tonsillitis for almost the whole winter. Until, i stopped using antibiotics. The first time i tried it i ended up with a horrible case of bronchitis so i had to take antibiotics. The second time i tried it, it took me about 15 days to actually heal, but i managed. And then i got sick less and less and last year i got sick just a couple of times and this year the same. This time i even convienced Petros to not take antibiotics, and hopefully he will stop getting sick all the time. I know it sounds crazy that antibiotics make you more vulnerable, but this is what happened to me.Of course now i take vitamin D3 and cod liver oil which are excellent immune boosters but that was n't the case last year.
What do you do to boost your immune system in the winter?
Wishing you wishes of health and strenght.
at 12:49:00 PM
Hi blogfriends! This week did not start the best way possible! I will spare you the details( you are thankful for that trust me!) but i will tell you that i am sick and sort of disgusting! And today i have a very full day work wise and i am trying to get into a functional state. Goddess bless chamomile and honey! This soothes all the things that need soothing in my body right now. Being sick while pregnant gives a whole new meaning into the word miserable. I can't wait to take a shower. Yesterday i could n't because i was shivering.
My husband just asked me if i was telling everybody that i am sick. And i responded that i am whining in an international level. Sorry for that by the way. This sort of negativity does not go well with Monday mornings.
Wish me a fast recovery, plpease, i need your healing enrgies!
at 12:06:00 PM
Greetings dear blogfriends! How are you? I am surviving this day so far just fine. You see i am sugar free for some time now and a big chocolate junkie so this day was supposed to be hard. But till now neither my husband or any friends caused a chocolate invasion, so everything is manageable!
Down to business. There is a love potion that i think i have n't shared with you already that my great grandmom showed my mom. It is like a mulled wine recipe.
You will put in a pot two glasses of red wine, two teaspoons of honey, two cloves, two cinnamon sticks, two nutmegs and the peel of an orange in two pieces. You will stir while you visualise an ideal(hot!) moment between you and the person you want. When it comes to a boil you withdraw it from the fire. And here comes the grewsome part, but feel free to skip it. You take a long needle and you pierce your left index finger and let two drops of blood fall into the wine, while you chant, we share now the blood of my heart(for like a gazillion times!). You then drain the liquid and put it in the refrigerator to cool. You can serve it like a sangria with apple cubes.
This is supposed to be made under the full moon and given to the object of your love on the same night(each person drinks its own glass of course). But hell it is Vday and this stuff is yummy so go ahead and have some. It has afrodisiac qualities. It brings mostly lust and passion, excellent for a cold February night, don't you think?
Have lots of (safe) fun tonight!
at 12:51:00 PM
Good morning blogland. I want to thank everybody yesterday for all the help. I managed to delete over 40 blogs. I checked most of them but in case i deleted any blog of your own that is indeed active please let me know because i did by mistake. I am very happy that i can find now over 40 new blogfriends. I love to hunt down new blogs to love and people to stalk! Anyone scared yet?
New moon is coming in 3 days(February 10) and i can not wait for that. There is a lot of cleansing to be done and then 4 pieces of Solomon 's Seal(polygonatum) will be put in the four corners of the house, to replace the old ones. I have n't done that in over two years, maybe more. This will protect the house, but before the pieces are put in place, the house must be clean and cleansed. After that it feels like a protective bubble. When people come into my house they do not want to leave. They feel serene and calm and many have described the feeling like being in a small church. Especially for my clients that i see in my office, it is a time to breath freely and regroup. I like the fact that people feel so nice here, but sometimes i have hard time to stay within the limits of time of each appointment, and see everyone in time.
One of the reasons that my house needs all this cleansing is the amount of people that come in it. Everyone enters here with a specific set of problems and sorrows, things to fix, relationships to mend and emotions to release. Although energies are supposed to be exchanged it is important that they do not get stuck in my place, and that both the home and i are protected. So, i do a lot of smudging, water spells, salt spells, rituals, prayers and i burn various incenses. It seems excessive but it is really not.
So, if you feel the need to protect your home or even workspace, smudge while chanting an incantation you prefer for cleansing and then set four pieces of Solomon's Seal on the four corners of your place. Go deosil starting from the East, and hide the first piece there, somewhere that it is not in danger of being thrown away, vaccumed, or seen( it does n't matter if it a bit in the South side, or in the North. It is not easy to make a perfact square in a house. Then put the second in the South, the next in the West(or West-ish) and the last in the North corner of the house. Solomon's seal can also be a part of powerful talismans and it has great protective qualities. If you are not familiar with it yet, find some. I am sure you will love it.
Be blessed, be lucky , be smart and be charmed!
at 12:06:00 PM
Hey you guys.. Do you remember the old blogger, that it was easy and fast and everything was logical? You wanted to follow a blog? There you had it, easy! You wanted to leave a comment, there you had it, without a gazillion numbers to type that made you dizzy! The old days, you could manage easily the blogs you followed, now there is only a sad little add button. The thing is that this way there are many blogs that are n't active anymore and since there is n't a follow button on their sites i am stuck with them. That wwould n't be a problem if i have n't already reached the maximum amount of blogs to follow(300). Do any of you know if there is still a way with the new blogger to manage your blogs???
Hugs and kisses!
at 1:44:00 PM
Hey blogpeople!! Don't you just love it when the Sun shines brightly and kicks you in the ass and off the sofa? Right now, i am typing this from a sofa but that is not the point. Since i bacame preggers and doc told me i had to rest, all the chores i was in charge of, became part of poor Petros's never ending to do list. Now if he was a woman he would end up over stressed, sleep deprived with a fully accomplished to do list.
Since he is a man, he was stress free, well rested and with a full room of clolthes that need washing, that he probably figured out i will get on to as soon as i have the baby. You probably think i am exaggerating about a room full of clothes and for that reason i am very sorry i did n't take a before picture! Just imagine that at some point my wonderful husband went out and bought himself some new clothes. If it was n't for clean underwear and my constant nagging he would n't have used the washing mashine at all these months. Well, to actually get to my point, last Friday the Sun shined brightly and the weather was n't as horrible as it was before, so reluctantly i begun washing clothes and towels, sheets and blankets and various other things. I pulled my back, a stomach muscle and a nerve in my arm, and although it is Tuesday and the poor washer did n't have a break yet, i still have a lot to go. I have clothes drying in the most weird of places and the whole house looks like a refuggee camp, but i am happy. I also cleaned up the kitchen, and went through most of our stuff, with an ending result of bags full of things to donate, recycle and throw away. Of course, as it always happens in those cases the house looks much worse than it did before, and i look like i was hit by a train, but i feel so much calmer.
Imbolc came with the promise of spring. Not just the promise of a better weather but an actual openness in our hearts and souls. I could feel the energies shifting, as they always do inside me and changing course from an introvert spiral to an extrovert one. That being said, since i was so busy, i did n't see any of my friends yet. But i decluttered not just my house but my soul as well. If i could just stop eating i would feel perfect. Imbolc came and i thought it would be nice to celebrate with a pudding(since it is dairy) which i ate(inhaled) and i have n't stopped eating since. My ever expanding belly is growing in an unnatural way. I look like i am ready to pop and i am only in my 6th month. But i loved celebrating this holiday while pregnant. The feeling of my baby kicking while i am in the middle of a ritual is undescribable. Although, it is sometimes surprisingly difficult to center or ground yourself, because of all the new energies, it is wonderful to do anything magical in this condition. You have so much more love to give and you care more deeply than before for everything around you and when this transforms into magical energies, it is a fantastic sensation.
I did a lot of cleansing. I used all the elements and casted various spells , because it was much needed. There is still one more to do but i am waiting for the new moon. It is a three day spell of cleansing and protection , in the form of return to sender spells. I do not do spells like that often, but when an injustice has occured those sorts of spells are the only ones that can rid you of these energies. Someone stole from my wallet. It was only 50 euros, but nothing brings bad luck as if when someone steals from you. I always thought that was not fair, but it is the universe's way to alarm you to protect yourself. I am not being vindictive although when i first realised it i was pretty pissed, but we are all responsible for our actions and the energies we release into the cosmos.
Be blessed my loves, be happy and feel the Spring coming towards us.
at 2:03:00 PM
Greetings blogfolks! Yesterday was the first night of the full moon with two more remaining and i had a blast! I was working till 11 pm and when all my clients left i got to do some magick. Firstly, i made a rosemary pentagram and a lavender wreath that i left as offerings with a huge piece of apple cake at the crossroads. This is the way i thank the Goddess for my baby since the night of the conception. Well, the rosemary pentagram is what i usuially do but i was feeling a bit more crafty yesterday! Then i smudged my home with sage, as always deiseil beginning from the Eastern room and making a full cycle. At the same time i was saying my favourite cleansing spell. I usually do not do cleansings on the full moon, but the last few days a lot of people have entered my home all with their own set of problems and it was more than needed. And finally at the end i cast a prosperity spell, that i recently written and i absolutely love while burning some incense i made last month.
After all that i cooked dinner, watered all the plants(all one million of them!),fed my pets and finally at around 12.30 am i was off my feet eating while watching vampire diaries. I waited for my husband to return from work till 4.15 am and we finally slept around 5. So, needless to say today i woke up at 2.30 pm and now three hours later i am still on my couch drinking coffee trying to unwind from this past week.
:Lately, i am feeling that although i am constantly busy that i do not do my best. This past week i worked crazy hours but i have n't studied at all for my final exam for my classical singing diploma, besides not missing any of my classes. Also, i feel like i have n't worked out enough except some really long walks i took every day. I feel like i could have eaten better although i am on day 5 after eliminating sugar from my diet. I went to buy some baby stuff but i stress about all the things i should have already done. It seems that if i do good in one part of my life, everything else just suffers. I can't help but feel guilty when on my spare time i am not productive. Like yesterday night instead of resting i could have studied, or meditated, or done some house chores, or make a baby musical playlist, or something along the lines. As i write all this down i understand that this is not a healthy mindset. At the very least, it is a very hard place out there, hostile and dark. Whenever we try to turn it into a happy place, full of light, it is nothing short of a miracle. When we try to create a smile, for us or those we love, or even those we barely know, when we do something to improve ourselves, lives, or surroundings, even the little things, we manifest greatness.
So, i should stop focusing on what i do n't do and really pay attention in all my tiny victories. This week, i helped a lot of people through my work. I enjoyed many long walks. I cut off sugar. I bought some new clothes for me and a few baby essentials. I worked hard on my classes. I made for me and my family many healthy meals. I spent time with my mom. I connected with the Spirit. I talked and sung to my baby. I watched a movie with my husband.. We came up with a name for our baby. I gave a lot of love to my pets. I arranged my closet. And, why not, i found myself some time to relax and recharge.
I have to accept the fact that i deserve a slow day. Some way, somehow..
Blessings and love and happy full moon!
at 6:11:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends! Who are you all amazing people doing today? We are ecstatic. The doctor just told us that we are having a baby girl which is good because, i had already bought a bunch of cute pink stuff and we have been referring to the baby as a "she" for months now.
On a magical note the full moon is just around the corner and i personally can't wait. I want to cast a blessing on the house because there are a lot of stagnant energies(as always this time of the year). I have collected on a recent trip spring water from a beautiful frozen mountain and i am going to bless it with basil(I still have one surving in the living room) rosemary and hibiscus flowers(that are still blooming outside, which is weird because it is really cold). Basil for luck, rosemary for cleansing and hibiscus for love. I will charge it under the full moon and sprinkle it around the house and water my plants with it. Also a couple of spells need to be cast on those three magical days.
Also it is time to plant a few seeds for good luck. I have some seeds of evergreens and i can't wait to plant them because they correspond with health, stability, longevity and protection. Each seed in a separate small pot with a twig, a written wish on paper and a coloured string.
What are your plans for the upcoming Esbat?
at 8:07:00 PM
Greetings to all of my wonderful blogfriends. Now that the word is out i can finally write here again. This is my place of truth, so keeping such a big secret from here made it impossible for me to blog. I want to tell you about a recent adventure i had that really scared the crap out of me!
The last couple of months i have developed seborrheic dermatitis on my face(especially around the nose, eye brows and forehead) and inner ears. I also had raw lips, really cracked especially at the edges which were swollen and painful. All these things are symptomatic with biotin deficiency very common in pregnancy(uncommon otherwise). If you read how this can affect a fetus(studies made on rats) you panick. So, of course, i called my obgyn, my very expensive, very well known obgyn, by the way! The midwife picked up, as always! She had never heard of biotin and told me to visit a dermatologist! At this point i have to mention it was two days before New Years so no one was working. I tried calling a really good doctor who happens to be my mom's client but she did n't pick up. And so the panicked pregnaqnt lady called the SOS doctors who make home visits. In my gut i knew before hand that this was a mistake. That the doctor would be an idiot. I cried and set up an appointment anyway. He came, he told me i had a seborrhoic dermatitis which i knew, that it had nothing to do with biotin deficiency(?!?),it was due to stress, and that my lips were cracked because of the saliva running through them during sleep!( What the fuck???!!) He took 100 euros, prescribed me with daktodor, and left!
Called the midwife again she said to take the ointment and that i did n't need anything else. I started cried again really hard(not while on the phone)!
I then called again my mom's client. She picked up, told me it was nothing to worry about, that i can take the ointment AND a biotin supplement and that it was really common in pregnancy!! I started crying again from relief this time. Called the midwife one more time and she sounded irritated that i was bothering her again. Keep in mind that in all these months i have never called them to ask for anything. Once i saw a drop of blood and because it did n't continue i told them at the scheduled appointment. She said she would have to ask the doctor and that she would call me back. This was around noon. She called me back at 21.00 o clock in the fricking evening to say that the doctor said it is not necessary to take a supplement but i should if it will make me feel better!! ?????What?????
My instincts have never failed me, i knew what was wrong with me and i needed the support of my doctor because i can not make any medical decisions by myself anymore. I felt really alone in all this and made me second guess my choice of obgyn.
Now bare in mind that i love you guys no matter what and if you feel like i was totally overreacting you are free to tell me so. I really want to hear someone else's perspective in all this, because i am obviously subjective and hormonal and this situation keeps bugging me. What 's on your minds?
Be blessed, be loved and be safe,
at 2:00:00 PM
Greetings blogfriends! I have been gone for a while but i had a pretty good reason. The actual reason was that i was in an introvert mode but i will get back at that. A lot has changed in my life since i was last here. Most of the things i was doing have faced out of my life, i am not kickboxing anymore and i am barely singing. But the change is much deeper than that. Every New Year's Eve i make this set of goals that are near to impossible(or downright there) and i force myself to do them and if i fail to any of them i feel bad. This time i have n't even thought of any resolutions. All my wishes are the same, all my desires begin and end to the same place. I just want to have a healthy and happy baby. Yes, you guessed that right i am pregnant. I just entered my 5th month. I wanted to tell you right away, but there were people in my life i have n't told and i did n't want them to find out too soon. Many do n't know still. We broke the news to most, but we do not broadcast it. But, nontheless this is my place to share and grow and it was time.
We were blessed, because we did n't even try. It was just this one time of unprotected sex on the full moon of September 30th. We have agreed to start trying after December this way i would be able to graduate this year. But that night we were driven by the Moon, entranced even. It was magical. After it happened i went to the crossroads and thanked the Great Mother with a rosemary pentagramm for the blessing She has bestowed upon us and i filled my hair with jasmine. It was very late and i was alone in the streets just me, my dog and the silence. I came here and wrote a post but i could n't tell everything because i did n't want people in my life to know. Which seems weird but i am very cautious about energies. So, i wrote and left the most important part out.
I knew i was pregnant right away. My mom kept telling me for 2 weeks that i am crazy and it does n't happen that easily. I could n't wait to be officially late to take the test and 2 days before my period was supposed to happen i peed on the stick and it was positive. All this time i have been meditating, doing prenatal yoga and taking pregnacare vitamins.
Then i had a complication and i had to stop singing, moving and generally doing anything that did n't involve a couch. It was scary and combined with the constant morning sickness, i was pretty miserable. But then finally after a bunch of u/s's the detachment was gone and i could stop taking utrogestan so the nautia was gone and i could do things again. I am still trying to return to normal and do the best job i can to provide a good home for her(we still do n't know the gender but all the women in my family have girls..).
Most of the magical things i have been doing was for protection of my baby. Every full moon, for all the three days of it, i have been leaving the same offering on the same crossroad to the Moon Goddess, thanking Her and asking for Her blessing.
Although, it is the scariest time of my life, i have never been happier and everything has shifted inside me. All the things i used to obsess about, all the things that seemed to matter just ceased to exist in my mind. It seems extreme, but it just happened and i do n't feel bad about it. Maybe i am still in a trance.
Blessed be and love to all.
at 1:26:00 PM