I missed you all so much. I have been stretched too thin lately and between doctors appointments, vet appointments, work and wedding stuff there was just no time to post anything. Everything is working out and i am relieved and almost stress free. It seems like i have multicystical ovaries which is a common condition and hopefully easily cured. Shadow has been neutered yesterday and he is doing fine. And last but certainly not least Beltane is approaching and i am filled with joy. We have yet to write our vals and pick some stuff up, but i can not believe how lucky i am to have a handfasting with the man i love. I am so glad he is not Christian and he is open to everything i want. He is a smoker, he can drive me nuts in a split second and he is always making fun of my tendancy to overreact. But ironically enough he is the one who keeps me sane, helps me deal with stress and he is the man of my dreams. I wished for him and he found me.
I love that he is a drummer. I love he is rock and i am classical. I love that he was always so skinny that he never had to diet(hence these questions like "do fries have a lot of calories?"). This fact makes him out of this world of madness along with his wonderful character. And he was the one who took me out of this world. ALthough it is pretty frustrating to watch him eat a whole pizza for dinner, instead of my pathetic excuse of a salad and never gain a pound. I love the kindness of his soul. I love his green eyes and his dark hair. I love his sense of humour. But most importantly i love the fact that together we are stronger, better and more powerful.
On a more practical note i was thinking of the colours of the ribbons. I want three different ones. Maybe pink, green and yellow but i am not sure yet. I am between a carrot and an apple cake. Wine and beer(as in ale). But i know we will be alone. I will be wearing rose quartz and aventurine. And all i really want is to marry my soulmate and bind us together for this life and those that will follow. The rest are unimportant.
Brightest blessings to all of you***
at 11:36:00 AM
Greetings blogland. Thank you for all your wishes. You helped me a lot. You gave me courage, strenth, energy and some great advice. I decided that it is a good thing what is happenning to me, because now i get to have a full check up and it is a wake up call. I have to focus on me instead of stupid little things that i constantly worry about.
I am pretty sure there is a physical reason for my menorrhagia, but it is a period related problem, so the witch inside me can't help it but wonder. Why is it that my femininity is screaming help? Does it have to do with my baby denial that i lately have?
I used to be a baby person. I loved playing with children, talking to them, helping them. I strongly believed that socialising with children fills you up with energy. Lately i have lost my connection with them and with that side of me. I frick out at the idea of having children and the responsibilities they come along with. I do not feel ready and i am worried i will never be. I am afraid i would n't be a good mom, i am way too immature for that. I am still a kid myself.
Do you ever feel ready, though?
As always i will write my question on a leaf and let it fly to the Moon. Maybe then i will have my answer!
Brightest blessings my wonderful readers. Have a magical and serene afternoon.
at 7:17:00 PM
My usual period problem is back. It does n't stop(almost two weeks now). This time i am going to another doctor to get a second opinion hoping he will not also tell me"must be psychological". Until my appointment i thought i should use every herbal remedy on the net. I drunk the juice of three lemons. I drunk a parsley tea, a nettle's tea and a sage tea(all of them diuretics i might add). I took an iron supplement and a long bath. But mostly i tried to relax, meditate and get zen and all. I prayed, burnt candles and casted a healing spell.
I would appreciate your healing thoughts and love, because they always work.
Brightest blessings, love and light.
at 10:39:00 PM
What a difference a bath and a few blogfriends can make! I feel so relaxed and centered and powerful again, and all thanks to you, your love and support.You are a treasure. I ventured through your blogs, your minds, your thoughts, your comments and i returned a whole person again. Thank you. Have a blessed day.
Love and light*
at 11:56:00 PM